I approached this bright throne. It had many precious stones on it. Giant angels that were also like beasts with eyes all over them were guarding the throne. I was afraid to come closer to the throne. I knew exactly where I was. The angels kept crying, "Holy, holy, holy!" Something that appeared to be a man but at the same time was too bright to really see sat on the throne. I didn't want to move closer to the throne, but something inside me was telling me, "Keep going, you need to keep going." I slowly (and I mean as slow as possible) moved towards the throne and as I got close to the angelic beasts, the one that looked like a man with eyes all over him halted me and said, "You can't come any closer. He may come closer to you though." As I looked up, I saw how big God looked on his throne. He looked larger than the biggest skyscraper I had ever seen! If I got any closer, surely he would step on me like I was an ant! I fell to my knees, filled with fear, yet at the same time filled with yearning. Then God stood up and started walking closer to me. It was strange though, instead of looking larger the closer he came towards me, he started becoming smaller. When he stood in front of me, he was only a couple feet taller than me. He was still very bright, but, I started seeing more of a man this time. It was Jesus! Tears welled up in my eyes, I uttered under my breath, "At last." Jesus smiled at me. He took me to a room where there was a mirror. I saw myself and I was all bloodied and filthy. I wore rags was a mess. I started to cry again, "I thought you saw me as beautiful...I thought I was made clean with you!" Jesus nodded, "You are seeing the way you see yourself in this mirror. I want you to look closer in the mirror, look deep down in your heart and see yourself the way I see you, and the mirror will show you how you really look."
I didn't want to look in the mirror again, it was painful enough to see what I had seen, but I listened to him. He wouldn't hurt me, right? I looked in the mirror, closer, and closer, and nothing seemed to change. I closed my eyes for a moment to focus on my favorite verse, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." I looked in the mirror again and I looked different. I was clean, I was wearing clothes that fitted a princess! I looked beautiful!
"I don't understand, how could this be me?" I grabbed my mouth in shock. "I'm a sinner! One of the worst! I'm supposed to be flithy, how can I be this beautiful?" Jesus looked into my eyes and had the brightest smile I had ever seen and said softly, "Because I cleaned you up. When I adopted you I cleaned you up from all your filth and while you still sinned, I took care of you still. I still cleaned you up. You are my precious daughter, and never have I seen you as ugly or filthy like you've seen yourself. I've seen you as my beautiful daughter who often gave her heart away to people who would crush it, but she ultimately gave her heart to me who would make it whole again."
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