Who Suffers Greater?

It's easy for us to compare ourselves with others.  We often compare ourselves with everything.  "I bet they have more money than me."  "She's so much prettier than me."  "He always gets the girls."  Do these sound familiar to you?  I know I'm constantly comparing myself with others - and I do that with everything!  But what about this question:  Who suffers greater?  I have a lot of issues, but I always compare myself and think "They suffer more than I do."  Yes, there are people who do suffer more than me, but this isn't really what you or I should think; rather what we should be asking ourselves is "What am I go to do about my suffering?" It's not so much about what we go through, but what we're going to do about it.

Now you may say "There's nothing I can do about my suffering!"  I get that, I really do.  Maybe you have that debilitating disease that you can't find a cure for.  Maybe you're about to lose your home.  Maybe you lost a child.  I'm not going to tell you that you're not suffering.  Things may seem hopeless, but there's ALWAYS hope!  Some of my mental illnesses I can't take any medications for (my ADHD, Depression, and severe anxiety).  Meds for ADHD cause worse hallucinations for people who already struggle with hallucinations.  I can't take any anti-depressants because they make me even more suicidal, and I can't be treated for it with ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) because I have a brain injury.  As for my severe anxiety, I take too many meds already so no one will give me anything for it.  Even my meds to treat my hallucinations doesn't always work.  There are times I still hallucinate.  There are times I still hear voices.  There are times I get delusional or paranoid still.  Meds don't fix everything.  Sometimes there are things we just have to live with.

But there are people I look at and think "Who am I to complain about my problems?  They have things FAR worse than me!"  I do this a lot honestly.  They easily become inspirations for me too.  If they can keep going I should too!

We all have our own battles we have to go through.  It doesn't matter who has things worse than us.  What matters is what we do with it.  I can spend all day complaining about my problems.  I can spend all day thinking "They have it worse than me, what the heck am I doing with my life?"  Or, I can focus on Jesus to get me through my battles.  It's not easy.  Trust me, I know it's not easy.  When I get really down, it's hard to remind myself that Jesus really does love me.  Just last week, I felt really suicidal.  I locked myself in the closet to keep myself safe.  But even then, I thought of different ways to do it.  I begged God in my tears "Have mercy on me!  Spare my life!  I don't want to die by my own hands!"  Eventually I asked my husband to remind me of how God thinks of me.  After that I started feeling a bit better (at least enough to not go through any suicidal attempts).  In our battles, cling to the feet of Jesus and don't let go!

Jacob got in a fight (I don't mean a fight with words, but a physical fight) with the angel of the LORD (which some believe to be Jesus) and told the angel that he would not let go until he was blessed (Genesis 32:22-31).  Cling to Jesus in your struggles and don't let him go.  He WILL rescue you in your time of need.  He will never let you go through your battles alone.  He is always with you.  Cling to Him.