At church today Pastor Chris Emmitt (Mountain Lake Church) talked about how Jesus' heart breaks for the broken. He read Matthew 9:9
As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax booth, and he said to him, "Follow me." And he rose and followed him.
He continued its verses 10-13
Later, Matthew invited Jesus and his disciples to his home as dinner guests, along with many tax collectors and other disreputable sinners. But when the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with such scum?" When Jesus heard this, he said, "Healthy people don't need a doctor - sick people do." Then he added, "Now go and learn the meaning of this Scripture: 'I want you to show mercy, not offer sacrifices. For I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners."
I really needed this sermon because I've been really struggling recently. I can't get into it, but it's really taken a tole on me emotionally.
A few years ago, I was in this Christian group on Facebook. They were talking about how people who say they are Christians have tattoos and piercings really aren't Christians. I fought against it obviously, and I told them how I've struggled with self-harm and suicidal tendencies (with three attempts - though at the time it was only one). They proceeded to tell me that I was really a goat instead of a sheep. What they meant was I wasn't really a follower of Christ, I just thought I was. I have really struggled with this. I know now I'm a sheep, but the thought still comes to my mind, "Am I really a goat?" I heard someone say this, and I have thought the same thing. If I were there when Jesus was calling for his disciples and telling them to follow him, what if he said my name and I was like, "Really? You pick me?" Then he says, "No, the person behind you." I wonder, "Will Jesus be happy when he sees me, or will he be frustrated/annoyed like 'Great, she's here now'?"
What does Jesus see when he sees me? Does he see me as a child with a broken heart because she gives her heart away to people who don't deserve it? Or does he think, "She's hopeless. She's going to continue to do the same thing over and over again."
Jesus' heart breaks for the broken.....
Let that sink in....
Are you broken? Are you at your breaking point? Are you hopeless? Jesus' heart breaks for you. He wants to help you. He wants to comfort you. It's difficult to, but let him be there for you. You are his precious child, let your Heavenly Father be the perfect father you need/want.