Face Everything and Rise

I've been listening to Papa Roach's song "Face Everything and Rise" from their new album F.E.A.R.

Face everything and rise
Face everything and rise

The streets crawl with a deadly omen
Outside I see a world that's broken
I can't breathe my heart is chokin'
I need a cure for this life I've chosen

My pain is a blessing in disguise
I feel it cutting and it's cutting like a knife
My pain, my pain is a blessing in disguise
I feel it cutting and it's cutting like a knife

I will face everything and rise
Never gonna quit until I die
Angels keep falling from the sky
I'll take the broken wings and learn to fly
I will face everything and rise

The earth shakes and the city's burning
But if feels like the tide is turning
Life hurts and there's no warning
Lightning strikes my heart is storming

The rain is a blessing in disguise
The flood's coming and it's drowning all the lies
The rain, the rain is a blessing in disguise
The flood's coming and it's drowning all the lie

I will face everything and rise
Never gonna quit until I die
Angels keep falling from the sky
I'll take the broken wings and learn to fly
I will face everything and rise

Throw me in the fire
But I'll never be the same
I come alive when I'm burning in the flames
I'm under fire
Finally wide awake
I am protected when I'm walking through the flames
Walking through the flames
Walking through the flames

I will face everything and rise
Never gonna quit until I die
Angels keep falling from the sky
I'll take the broken wings and learn to fly
I will face everything and rise

The pain, the pain is a blessing in disguise
Face everything and rise
The pain, the pain is a blessing in disguise
Face everything and rise 

I've been trying to escape all my problems for a long time.  I've made three attempts to kill myself (twice this year).  But it seems like God keeps saving me and forcing me to face my problems.   I try to focus on other people, but I can't seem to be able to.  I know people have things worse than me, but I can't handle other people's problems and my own problems at the same time.  I'm overwhelmed.  I'm starting my third week of DBT (again) tomorrow.  The first time I did it I learned different ways to deal with my problems....but I stopped doing them and became a mess.  So I'm doing DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) again and am solidifying what I learned.

Having PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) constantly puts me in flight mode.  I run from my problems, I run from people, I'm constantly running.  But I guess God wants me to stop running and dig my heels into the ground and face things head on.  I'm never going to get better if I keep running.  I'm always going to be a coward if I don't face them.  It's time to face the pain than running away from it.  I will rise out of the ashes and become a new person.