Humility

What exactly is humility and what does it look like?  This is something I've wondered for a while.  When you think of humility, you think of someone who isn't prideful right?  Someone who doesn't think they're over the top great.  It's also someone who doesn't think they're over the top bad either.  I have a lot of false humility.  What that means is I beat myself up ALL the time and I have a lot of self-hatred.  That's the thing though, there's a lot of self-focus.  Someone who is humble is not self-focused.  They are selfless.  As I've been thinking about the saints, I've noticed a lot of them were selfless.  They didn't focus on themselves, they focused on others.  I spend so much time focusing on my pain or how bad of a person I think I am.  I try to focus on others, but I always go right back to focusing on myself.  I am trying to learn how to be more humble.  They say asking God to help you be humble is a dangerous prayer.  Indeed, I'm a bit afraid to pray it myself.  He won't just give you humility, he'll work you through it.  The thing you have to ask yourself is, is it worth it?  Is humility worth the trials ahead?  Is humility worth being broken for a while?  I'm broken as it is, but if God wants to break me even more in order for me to be humble, then so be it.  Humility is something I really want to have, so I'm prepared to work for it.  I'm tired of always focusing on myself.  I want to focus on the pain others have so I can help or pray for them, and less focus on my own pain.