Friendship

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10





As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.

Proverbs 27:17






I had a very rough week, and today I found out a dear friend of mine has passed away.  It's been really tough getting through each day.  I've wanted to give up.  I've come close to giving up.  But there has been something that has been helping me get through each day - my friends, my spouse, and my family.  The people who really care about me.  I don't want to cause grief for anyone, especially my husband.  I really don't want to get into details, but something happened last week and it just made me snap.  I'm doing better now though.  I spent nearly all week grieving, and then yesterday I realized, "I need to get up and get going.  I can't just lay in bed crying all day, every day!"  So I got up, got a shower (I hadn't in a few days), got dressed, ate some dinner, and went walking.  Surprisingly, getting out helped a little.

A lot of people don't know what happened last week, but the people who do have been there for me, helping me through it.  If you're reading this and wondering why I didn't tell you about it, please don't be hurt or offended.  I really didn't want to talk about it and I didn't want to worry anymore people than there already were.  To those who have been there with me through all this, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Friendship is very important to me.  I take my friendships very seriously - perhaps too seriously at times....

You look at my Facebook page and I have A LOT of friends on there; but most of them really aren't "friends."  Some are only there for games I play.  Some are only there because of my husband or my dad's ministries.  And still others are there because, I don't know why.  I know them, but they have literally forgotten who I am.....

I have some friends on there, but we don't really talk.  There are very few people who will actually talk to me.  I tend to be stressful for people - and who could blame them for avoiding me?  As much as it pains me, I don't blame them.  I'm a Negative Nancy pretty much ALL the time.  You can probably tell (if you've read enough of my blogs) that I can be pretty dark.  But I ALWAYS try to add hope in my blogs - true hope that is found in Jesus Christ.  Not very many people can understand the darkness that surrounds me everywhere I go.  But there are those, who through the kindness of their hearts, and with a lot of patience, have taken up the torch that many people have just dropped and left.  People can't handle me usually, and that can be a pretty heavy burden to carry on my own.  But some do make the effort, and while I wonder how long they can handle me, I'm grateful for them even attempting.  I try very hard to be a good friend, but I often realize I'm not a very good one.  I drain people, and usually it's too late by the time I realize I've done this.

"But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up."  I've spent a lot of time falling with no one to help me up - some of that is my own fault though.  I tend to push people away, especially right after my trust has been broken.  DON'T DO THIS!  Be careful of who you trust of course, but don't push everyone away.  Trust me, it's a very lonely place to be.....

"If either of them falls down, one can help the other up."  I have certainly seen this past week that even though it's been very dark for me (and part of that is my medications weren't working properly), there have been people who have bore the burdens with me and helped me get back up - even encouraging me just to get out of bed!  I hope that I'll be a friend like that, where I can be more encouraging than discouraging.

Again, to those who have been there for me through all this, I thank you so very much.  May I be as good of a friend to you as y'all have been to me 😊