Anger and Silence

Don't sin by letting anger control you.  Think about it overnight and remain silent.

Psalm 4:4




When I was younger, I didn't have much of an anger problem (as far as I can remember anyway).  The older I've gotten though, I've gotten more angry and I will admit - more bitter.  I used to just keep my anger buried inside, but then as a teenager, I had a therapist tell me I couldn't just hold it all in (emotions in general).  That at some point I'm going to need to let them out.  So I started doing that - unfortunately that's when I started getting angrier and the anger got more uncontrollable.  I never thought I'd end up having anger problems - among other things I thought (or hoped) would never happen either.  Not only do I lash out at myself (when I feel like I have to punish myself - hence the cutting), I lash out at people who care about me....I keep people at a distance and if I fear they're getting too close, I push them away.  I don't allow people to get very close to me because bad things always happen - to them or to me.  There have been some instances where I've let people get close to me, and it always ended badly - though for some reason my husband is still here so I guess that's one person, lol 😆

Anyway, among my MANY struggles, I have anger issues too.  I've known it's been a problem for me for the past few years, but recently I've realized it's something I REALLY need to work on.  It's made me realize it's no wonder so many people leave me (though I still don't understand why they leave over politics - why can't we be friends with people who have opposing views?).  I'm either too much work to deal with (like WAY too much drama that follows me), or I end up pushing them away - sometimes that pushing away is through anger.  I have a swearing problem - my mouth is WORSE than a sailors, though I am working on it (and getting better at not swearing as much).  I'm very "rash" and vengeful....I've ripped photos and one time threw my wedding ring at my husband.  I yell, sometimes I throw things (not at people), I've come close to punching the wall - or even the mirror.  I've slapped someone across the face once (that was in 9th grade though...so does that really count?).  I say a lot of things I really don't mean, but of course I pay the price for it later.

I guess in a sense, my anger can be seen as a defense mechanism.  I'm trying to protect myself from whatever is going on in the situation.  I don't know, maybe that's how it is for everyone....




Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.  Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.

James 1:19-20

Instead of getting angry, we need to shut up and listen.  Listen to whoever is causing us to become angry, and be quiet.  If we're unable to listen, then we need to just walk away from the situation and cool off.  Really think about what our response will be (if we should even respond at all).  If we are going to approach the issue again with whoever is causing us to be angry, we need to be calm, and not be accusative (I do have that problem...).  Approach the person in love, not anger.  Sometimes though, it may be better not to approach the problem again.  It may be better to just let it go.  Yea, I know that's REALLY difficult.  It's like the saying "Choose your battles carefully."  Really think about whether the argument is really that important.  If it's not, then.....

Sorry, I had to put the Frozen reference in - I've actually never seen the movie....

*Ahem*  Anyway, that's all I've got to say on anger.  It's definitely a work in progress....